An ode to baby led weaning

6 months came around

And all of a sudden,

My wee little bubba

Became quite the glutton.

He watched from afar 

As mum and dad ate,

High time he decided

For food on his plate.

We tried with a spoon

To fill up his tummy,

But no he was stubborn

Just like his mummy.

Cheeky man wanted

To use his hands,

Not giving a toss

What mummy had planned.

Cucumber, toast,

Tomato and peas,

One mum I heard

Gave chrysanthemum tea!

Bananas and broccoli,

Get shovelled in,

A shame most of it

Ends up in the bin.

Porridge and pasta

Squelched between fingers,

With cheese I find

The smell don’t half linger.

Eggs, ham, tuna,

Even wild boar,

Go into his mouth

Then onto the floor.

Avocado, peaches,

Papaya too,

You’d never believe

What comes out in his poo.

Nappies are now

A treasure chest,

Filled with goodies like raisins,

Just look out for his vest.

The high chair being

His favourite place

To clear out his bowels

It’s such a disgrace!

At family dinners

His tummy will rumble,

A poonami is coming

Daddy will grumble.

He sits on his throne

Face red as he trumps,

The stench travels quickly

One almighty dump.

Quick mummy yells

Get him in the bath

But baby don’t care

He thinks it’s a laugh.

He wriggles with glee

As his arse is bared

Touches his bum

And gets shit in his hair!

Oh what a disaster

This has all been,

Don’t worry mama

One day he’ll be clean.

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